My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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