no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
This girl is more easily done than said...
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
