I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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