Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
