All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
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The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
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...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Bring me that man meat
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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