I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
