Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on a dog bed..
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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