Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
