Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Randomize