Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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