It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
