I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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