google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
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