Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
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