Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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