I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
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