If i come over, it means nothing
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
