Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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