Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Are we still banned from the library?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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