Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
