Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Man, jail baloney is awful.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I need water and some morals
Randomize