Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Farmville is her only friend.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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