Just cropdusted the office
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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