I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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