haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
