My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
