I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
nutella sex= disaster
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
