Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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