Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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