im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
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