Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
