Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
