you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Randomize