Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
We left the knife in your bed.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Randomize
