I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
