Have you finally orgasmed yet?
People in love make me want to vomit
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
