this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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