Well apparently he's into motor boating.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize