he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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