I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
