I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
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