Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Randomize
