Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
