i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
