Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
