he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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