Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
We are two peas in an std pod
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
last night I used snow as a chaser
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
