nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
