I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
