Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
