nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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