Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
