i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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